The Negativity Bias

As human beings, we have a tendency to be biased towards the negative.  Some of us tend to focus on the negative side of things and dwell on them causing unnecessary stress and anxiety.  This is what experts refer to as the "Negativity Bias", when the negative events have a greater impact on our brains than the positive ones.  This may be one of the reasons why we find it difficult to overcome bad experiences or for traumatic events to linger in our minds.

 How then do we overcome the "negativity bias"?  I think self awareness is an important step that can help us manage these negative thoughts.  Try to focus more on the positive things in your life, make it a daily habit to think of good things or whatever it is that makes you happy.  

Remember that we cannot stop negative things from happening, but we can choose how we deal with them.

Inside your Circle

 It has been a while since I wrote something for my blog. I always seem to have so many things on my mind, but every time I start to put my thoughts into writing they end up being drafts or a collection of words on paper.  But today I decided to sit down in front of my computer and write about something I think would help make our lives a little "less stressful".

I think one of the reasons why we sometimes feel unhappy about our lives, is that we worry so much about how other people perceive us, we get affected by other peoples words and actions and most of us have a tendency to dwell on those negative emotions for a long time. 

One harsh reality is that sometimes no matter how nice you are, or how good you are to people, there will always be that someone who would think otherwise.  It can be a workmate, a classmate, a "so called friend", an employer or even a family member.  And what's worse is we give them control over our feelings by reacting negatively to whatever it is they say or do.  Remind yourself that you will never have control about how others feel towards you or what they think of you, but you will always have control over you own thoughts, feelings and actions.  You can choose to react negatively towards them or you can choose to maintain your own peace of mind and not dwell too much on things that are out of your control.

Imagine yourself inside your own circle.  Remind yourself of things YOU can control, and learn to let go of things you have no control over...

Random Thoughts...

Whatever life throws at you, may you always find it in your heart to be "thankful" for everything, even for the difficulties you encounter.

Life was never meant to be easy, how can you appreciate the good if you never experienced the bad.

Enjoy every single moment because you will never know how long it can last.

Never, ever take anything or anyone for granted.

Choose to be happy no matter what...

The New Normal

     Ever since Corona virus was introduced to humanity, we've been hearing people use the words "new normal". But how has it been for everyone?  What changes did you do for yourself in order to keep with the "new normal?"  As for myself, I had to go back to wearing scrub suits every once in a while when I am in the hospital, no more wearing of lipsticks because I don't want to smear my mask just in case I need to recycle it, alcohols and sanitizers are a must have in my bag or pockets,  I also have to stick to a routine whenever I come from the hospital, foot bath and disinfecting my shoes, going directly to the shower as soon as I enter the house, washing the clothes that I wear, disinfecting things brought from outside and making sure it does not get mixed up with my other things.  Less face to face contact with patients and slowly transitioning to online consults.  But the most difficult part of this new normal is not being able to kiss and hug my kids whenever I want to, especially during the times when I was down with the flu.

     I honestly miss how life was before covid, I know that a lot of people are going through a much difficult time and I hope that things will get better for everyone.  I also know that it will take a while for people to get used to it, but I hope hope that it's something we all should be open about.  We may not necessarily like the fact that we can't shake hands when we meet new people, or we can't immediately hug our loved ones whom we have not seen for a while or that we always hide our smiles behind the mask that we wear, but its something that we must do to keep ourselves and others safe.  We may not necessarily like the "new normal", but we have to follow it because for now this is the best way for us to protect ourselves and our family.  Stay safe everyone!

Uncertainty in the middle of a Pandemic

"Hope is like the sun, when its behind the clouds it's not gone, you just have to find it."

          The past few weeks have been tough for all of us.  Each day we wake up to a world that's quite different from  the one we were used to.  Covid19 changed the lives of so many people all over the world.  Social distancing.  Enhanced community quarantine. Curfews.  Stay at home.  This is something new for everyone and it's scary because there is an air of uncertainty about this change.  But somehow I would tell myself that to be able to move forward we must embrace the fear and uncertainty and strive to live each day the best way we know how for nothing in this world is permanent.

          Tell yourself not to dwell on thoughts that would lead to negative feelings and emotions.  Use this time to slow down and be grateful for the gift of life. Keep connected with family and friends while maintaining social distancing.  Show kindness whenever possible.  Have faith that this will all be over soon.

     May hope never leave you during this difficult and trying times.

     

Note to Self

Dear Self,

          You have been hurt, you have been broken... but you managed to pick up the pieces and made yourself whole again.  It was never easy, you struggled to keep yourself from drowning in sadness.  You had to force yourself to smile when all you wanted to do was cry.  The hurt you were feeling was so unbearable that at one point you just wanted the pain to go away.   

          But somehow in the middle of all the anger, the sadness, the pain and the anguish you were feeling you found the courage to face life again.  You were ready to forgive, but not to forget the lessons you learned.  You were willing to trust and love again.

     You found the courage to look pain in the eye and say, “You can hurt me, but you can never stop me from being happy again.”  

Hold on to Hope

To the person who feels that life is a constant struggle of trying to break free from the emptiness that surrounds him.

To the person who has been in the dark for a long time, and doubts if he would ever see the light again.

To the person who is at war with his own demons and is so afraid that he might be at the losing end... 

Life may seem so uncertain right now, but never lose hope. 

Learn to look beyond your pain and find meaning in all your sacrifices. 

There is always someone out there who cares for you, do not be afraid to reach out and believe that you can let the light shine back into your life again.

Walls...

Some people tend to put up their wall so high,  

that no matter how hard you try to reach out 

and climb to the other side,

it just seems impossible...

Sometimes you just have to stop trying, 

because unless they break their walls

they will never let you in

and you will end up hurting yourself in the process...